10.26.05
Through the eyes of others
On my journey home tonight I completely missed my turning and had to go all the way around a roundabout to turn back. Then later I forgot to turn the grill off (husband was late in) and burnt the dinner. What on earth was wrong with me? Well actually I was reflecting on the day far too much. I hope I wasn’t as dangerous as it feels I was.
How often do those we work or live with give us feedback about how we come across to others? Well the prospect can be quite scary, and as for me, what someone told me today was a bit of a shock. Apparently I am too self deprecating, particularly when stressed, I tend to run myself down and apologise unnecessarily. The informant was keen to tell me that I have no need to do this as I am pretty efficient when it comes to my job (well that’s a relief).
Now if I do this, then it is news to me and if I do it then why? If I don’t know I am doing it how can I stop it? Also does it really matter?
Well actually I care very much about how I am viewed, and maybe that is my problem; over eager to do well and to please. I hate to think I am not liked and I hate to have to say things to people that they might not like. Being self aware is a scary thing though.
I came home and asked the husband and son about this. Hubby claims not to have noticed anything, though has spent the evening winding me up by apologising. I returned the favour by burning his dinner and making him go and buy fish and chips (damn that’s the diet blown). My son on the other hand, astute child that he is says that sometimes I apologise for things which aren’t actually my fault.
One thing is for sure, I am not apologising for this posting. So there!
Kim said,
October 30, 2005 at 11:37 pm
Oh man, I haven’t had fish and chips in ages. I’ll be in Ireland next summer and want to get to England as that is where I really want to be! I want to sit in a pub and have a pint of whatever and fish and chips! I’m so easy to please! : D
Julie said,
October 31, 2005 at 4:51 pm
Sounds great. In fact there is no where better to enjoy fish and chips than a british sea side town. I have especially fond memories of whitby (the place where Dracula originates) on the North Yorkshire coast eating fish and chips.